08/24/2026
I’ve been reading Jen Hamilton’s Birth Vibes and one of my favorite parts so far is her “Communication Vibe Check.”
Because we talk a LOT about birth preferences.
Unmedicated or epidural.
Induction or spontaneous labor.
Delayed cord clamping.
Skin to skin.
Pushing positions.
But how often do we talk about how you want people to communicate with you while all of that is happening?
Do you want every detail?
Do you want someone to give you the important information without making your brain feel like it just got handed a 47-page terms and conditions agreement? 😂
Do you need your nurse to slow down and explain things step by step?
Do you want to know the “why” behind every recommendation?
Do you want encouragement and reassurance, or are you more of a “please just tell me what’s happening and what the hell we’re doing” kind of person?
Do you process information better if someone shows you?
Do you want your partner included in every conversation?
That matters.
Because when I ask you to visualize your birth, I don’t necessarily want you obsessing over exactly how your baby gets here.
Birth is unpredictable and babies, quite frankly, do not give a s**t about our plans. 😂
Instead, think about how you want to feel while it’s happening.
Did you understand what was happening?
Did you feel heard?
Did you feel comfortable asking questions?
When something was recommended, did you understand why?
When the plan changed, did you feel like your care team brought you into the conversation instead of having a whole meeting about your body three feet away from you?
THAT is part of your birth plan too.
And this is also why education before labor matters so much to me.
I don’t want the first time you hear words like Pitocin, internal monitor, epidural, vacuum, fundal massage, or newborn medications to be while you’re exhausted, contracting, half naked, and trying to process fifteen things at once.
You do not have to become an L&D nurse before you give birth.
You just deserve enough education to understand your options, know what questions to ask, and feel like an active participant in your own care.
And honestly, this is one of my favorite parts of being both an L&D nurse and a doula.
As your doula, we get the time before birth to figure out what matters to you, how you learn, how you want information presented, what questions you have, and what makes you feel safe and supported.
Then when birth day comes, you’re not walking into that room completely blind.
You have context.
You know your preferences.
You know you can ask questions.
And you have someone beside you who already knows your vibe.
And if your birth decides to go completely off script?
Cool. Rude. But cool. 😂
At least you still deserve to understand what’s happening and feel supported through it.
That kind of preparation is a huge part of what birth + postpartum doula support with Willow & Wren looks like. 🤍
