09/07/2026
As the landscape of Lewis & Harris gave us jaw-dropping scenery around every corner, I kept saying, "eeeek, I wish we could stop here!" But the weather wasn't in our favour: heavy rain, more rain, then 50mph winds, oh and then some more rain. Not great for a camera on a tripod
Then one evening the skies semi-cleared. My fiancée was happy to head back out with me to this one spot.
I set everything up. "All good?!" "Yep, all clear, go for it!" My sign to take everything off and go.
There I was, b!tt naked, crawling over the stones. Phone connected to my camera, ready to shoot and then... "disconnected." Reconnected. Disconnected again. A few rounds and then... I gave up. Standing in the cold wind, feeling vulnerable, I stopped. Tears welled up. "That's it. Let's go."
She turned to me: "Absolutely not, we've made it all the way here. Give me the camera, tell me what to do, and... do your thing."
Standing there, exposed, in front of my fiancée: maybe it was the wind, maybe the rain, maybe the months of imposter syndrome I've been quietly battling made it's way to the surface once more.
But how could I say no to her, camera in hand, smiling at me like that?
So the jumper came off once more. "Stay there! Now wait! Wait....." Me: "It's bloody cold!" Her: "yeah well.. we need to wait for the waves!!!"
Waves of doubt washing over me, one bigger then the other; feeling silly and oh so out of place. And then after a little while, I called it.
Back in cosy clothes, I looked at the camera. A soft smile returning once more looking at her ''Someone should hire you!''
It reminded me of a recent chat with one of you during the Reveal, tears of joy in her eyes. "I finally see myself, truly," she said. "You always seem so confident, how do you do it?" I smiled: "Lots of therapy: but also, I'm not always."
Because that's the thing about what you see here. A photo is one still frame: not the wind, not the tears, not the crawling around convinced I was ridiculous and cursing to myself.
Social media is a highlight reel. It shows the result, never the doubt before it.
Thank you to my gorgeous fiancée, for always believing in me, even when I don't.
📸 by fiancée aka Dawn❤