06/24/2026
I woke up this morning with Mom on my mind. In memory, I saw her in her flowered apron, the one with scalloped frills along the lower edge. She was in her beloved, little kitchen. The old, wood cutting board rested on the table covered in flour and bits of kneaded dough. Next to the cutting board, two pie tins filled with dough which had already been pressed into the pans.
Along the upper edge, one carried the finished trim work brought on by decades of practice. What I saw active in my mind was the second pie tin, spinning in rhythmic subordination to Mom's hands as she worked the fore and middle finger of her left hand against the dough and into the fore finger of her right hand. In rapid motion, those gnarled, arthritic hands worked painfully, skillfully, artistically around the upper perimeter.
In our youth, I didn't consider the silent, lonely pains Mom carried into her work. I only saw her mastery at baking. Now that my 68th year is approaching, I know her body held pains unexpressed. She kept them, but carried on.
Though her death has kept us apart for thirty-one years, my mind holds her closely. I've learned that we go on, living in the absence of many loved ones. We go on by faith. We go on forever affected by how their lives furnished ours with invaluable, impenetrable lessons and memories.
Grief does not fully pass away. We come to accept it. We come to rejoice in the sweet by and by, knowing we'll meet on that beautiful shore. We come with thankful hearts knowing our loved ones abide in the immediate presence of God. In time, though grief has its continuing place in our lives, we think more often of our loved ones in the present tense. I wonder what Mom's day is like this day in her eternal home. What specifically might she be doing in her own never ceasing praise and joy? I can't be sure of the details, but I am sure of her thorough, perfect, painless peace, love and joy. And that carries my mind from memories I'll continue to hold dear to her present life and much gratitude.