03/14/2026
Making art and posting the last few weeks has felt so incredibly disingenuous and I haven’t had the heart to.
2 weeks ago I was walking downtown with a friend and we saw an unmarked black vehicle with what looked like federal agents inside close to our businesses. My first thought was, “f**k, this is it.”
Despite my “protection” as a naturalized U.S. citizen from Mexico, being apolitical no longer feels like a neutral option. Neutrality in moments of injustice has felt a lot like complicity lately.
I’m embarrassed to admit how afraid I’ve been about speaking up against this administration because I don’t feel safe in the U.S. anymore, but I’ve also wondered who would be outraged on my behalf if I was taken into a detention facility and if I would be worthy of someone speaking on my behalf.
I grew up in with an authoritarian parent. Questioning the status quo wasn’t welcomed - it was punished. As a sensitive kid who asked a lot of questions, I spent a lot of my childhood crying and hiding because how powerless I felt having a father and older brothers that were bullies.
Recent events have resurfaced that feeling and the shame I used to feel about being Mexican. Growing up in the U.S. I experienced so many varying degrees of racism that hiding my ethnicity and eventually white washing my name to Andy felt like the only option, but the childhood version of me pictured here would feel pretty fu***ng disappointed that I’ve gone back to the learned behavior of hiding.
The glimmer of hope in this existential s**t show has been realizing that although I don’t have much power politically, I can use the eye I’ve cultivated for helping people look powerful in images. Photography helped me reclaim my own sense of agency and has created a life full of art, design, music, and connection that I dreamed of as a kid.
This post is mostly just a cathartic purge of the poison that has built up lately, a reminder to show up for the younger version of me and others that feel disenfranchised and powerless and a call to connect with local leaders that are championing compassion, charity, equality, environmental stewardship, and the protection of democracy.