08/08/2026
In honor of my son’s 13th birthday, I am sharing 13 things I’ve learned about birth and babies and parenting. (In no particular order bc I just made these up on the fly)
1. You can do “all the right things” and still not get the birth you hoped for. Babies make their own way!
2. You can be happy your baby is healthy and still mourn the birth you wanted. Both things can be true. And you should take the time to process when you are ready.
3. HIRE A DOULA AND PHOTOGRAPHER. Literally my biggest regret for my births. I was cheap and thought I was fine on my own, but I think things would looked a lot differently if I had more support!! Also I am grateful for the above photos but they are low quality for sure!
4. Birth and babies are not math problems. A+B does not always = C. You cannot control the outcomes.
5. Give yourself some grace. Buckets.🪣 for every member of your family ready to dump when needed…but mainly for yourself.
6. YOU.DO.YOU.BOO!!!
7. Find a provider your trust!!!
8. Trust your intuition. Most of the time Dr. Google or chat GPT will just send you in a spiral. Ask a friend and trust yourself instead.
9. Postpartum anxiety and rage are real and we should be naming it and getting support.
10. Go to therapy before you have kids. And during. And after.
11. Don’t raise your kids based on the values of others (your extended family, friends, instagram influencers, coworkers). Find what YOUR values are and proceed accordingly.
12. “Do it together sometimes”. If you need groceries and your friend needs groceries, go together. Same with laundry and dinners and walks. Put yourself out there and make community bc you will be more sane with a buddy.
13. Do the best you can with the resources you have. Be kind to yourself. 💜
