04/18/2023
Stacey Fishel was already an accomplished photographer when she received an unusual assignment. Over the years she had developed her expertise in photographing high school graduates, babies and families. But that did not prepare her for a project that would change her life.
When Stacey was hired to be the newborn photographer at IU West Avon Hospital, the director of the Women’s Center there asked her if she would also use her talents for families on the opposite end of the birthing spectrum. Would she also provide bereavement photography -- capture images for Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep (NILMDTS), an organization that “provides the gift of remembrance portraits to parents experiencing the death of a baby.”
Apprehensive, Stacey said she would give it a try. “It was hard at first, but I knew from the second I shot those first photos that I needed to do it,” she says.
NILMDTS offers the gift of healing, hope and honor to parents experiencing the death of a baby through the overwhelming power of remembrance portraits. Professional-level photographers volunteer their time to conduct an intimate portrait session, capturing the only moments parents spend with their babies. Parents are gifted with delicately retouched black-and-white portraits free of charge.
These priceless images serve as an important step in the healing recovery for bereaved families. NILMDTS remembrance photography validates the existence and presence of these precious babies by honoring their legacy.
While the thought of photographing infants who have passed may sound off-putting, the Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep organization has demonstrated that the simple, but delicate, act of staging a family photo can help families experiencing tragedy find comfort when their emotions are at their most raw.
Apprehensive at first, Stacey said she would give it a try. “It was hard at first, but I knew from the second I shot those first photos that I needed to do that,” she says.
She eventually brought her talents to Franciscan Health Indianapolis. Now, having photographed more than 300 grieving families in the last dozen years, Stacey has been recognized as NILMDTS’s National Affiliate Volunteer of the Year. Relying entirely on volunteers to deliver the healing power of remembrance via photography, Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep made Stacey its first-ever volunteer award recipient.
"Stacey has been with us for over 8 years and has been a Godsend to our families who have needed her,” said Deborah Marshall, manager of volunteers at Franciscan Health Indianapolis campus. “She has always answered the call when asked and never turned us down. Some people are hesitant at first to have her photograph their infants, but then become incredibly grateful for the gift of something they never would have had.”
As one can imagine, being part of such an emotional moment in families’ lives can lead to long-term friendships. Stacey stays in touch with many families. “Some people are not interested because they don’t want the reminder of such painful time, and I fully understand that,” she says. “But others want to stay in touch with those with whom they’ve shared that experience.”
After so long and having shot so many photos of grieving families, Stacey also remembers fondly the opportunities she has had to photograph healthy babies born to families that previously lost an infant. They are called “rainbow babies,” representing hope after the storm.
“That is a particularly gratifying experience,” she says, “to share a family’s darkest moments, but also its most joyous. That’s happened to me on several occasions; they are unforgettable.”
Thank you, Stacey, for all you do.
