11/11/2021
I contemplated putting this here on my business platform but I think this is healing for me, in all areas.
Baby Hampton👼🏻
I don’t really know how to put into words the pain and grief that Travis and I have experienced this past week. Yet, also tell you the peace and comfort that we have received from the Lord and those around us. I feel like I’ve been through so much mentally and physically that I’m a different person. On Wednesday, November 3rd, I went into my OB’s office for them to look at my bleeding that a had been experiencing for a couple of days. In my mind, I was going to be put on bed rest for a while and I was fine, my baby was fine. I told Travis and my mom that they didn’t need to come because everything was fine. So they did an ultrasound and I just remember it was so quiet in the room. Then he looked at me and said something that shattered my heart into a million pieces, “It looks like your baby stopped growing around 11 weeks and now no longer has a heart beat.” I was in shock. From there I call Travis to come be with me at the office and he was there in 5 minutes. Here, the grieving starts while we try to process that this is our reality. On Saturday, November 6th, at around 5:20pm I had my baby. It was hours of extremely intense labor and contractions that I was not expecting. I didn’t know it in those moments of pain that the Lord was giving me something that not every mother who loses a child gets, closure. The chance to see their baby in one whole piece. The days following I got to hold my baby in my hands and say goodbye even though it was so hard to let go. I got to see the gender, that I didn’t get to know yet from the ultrasounds. I had a boy. The chance to see every finger, toe, eyes, nose, mouth, sweet little legs, arms, ribs, precious little stomach, and personality as he had one of his hands under his chin that would not move off. No one will ever be able to tell me that my child was not a human life and didn’t have purpose. He only had around 12 weeks in my belly but had so much life and purpose. He was just a little bitty human, yet he was just still growing like we all do everyday.
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