06/18/2026
Ah yes, I-81 at absolutely any time of day, because time no longer exists once you’re on it. Pennsylvania’s longest running psychological experiment disguised as a highway. You’ve got a convoy of tractor trailers playing aggressive bumper to bumper chess, two lanes merging into one for no reason anyone alive can explain, and 47 cars all committed to going the exact same speed like it’s a pact.
Nobody’s passing, nobody’s exiting, we’re just… here. That one guy in a beat up pickup hauling scrap metal with bungee cords from 1995. He’s leading the pack. The GPS says 31 minutes. It’s lying to your face. Gonna be at least an hour.
You don’t drive on 81… you enter it and accept whatever fate it has planned for you
