05/26/2026
Astaroth
April 10 2016 - May 21 2026
Astaroth wasn't an easy dog and that wasn't his fault, he was riddled with anxiety and had big feelings that he wanted to scream about, especially whenever we had guests. But he was my baby dog, my forever puppy. He always tried so hard for me. Just wanted to be loved and get butt-scritches. He loved to chew on Evie's ears growing up like his own security blanket, and after we lost her, he was the best big brother to Pazuzu and Moxie. He passed the torch well.
He was healthy until he wasn't. And that's the heartbreak of it all in the end. I wish we could have helped him. One of the most painful parts of this was that he was so brave, sitting in the waiting room for hours, we knew he was so confused and nervous but he was being so brave and so quiet. But I know he just wanted to come home. It devastates me that he never got to come home. Whenever we got back in the car and took him somewhere new and strange instead of returning to the house, he seemed even more confused. He wanted us to take him home. I wanted to take him home.
He was a little butterball of a floof when we got him. When we made a stop for coffee on the way home, he fell asleep in my friend's lap (she remained one of his all-time favorite humans). We all called him a demon potato. He had an abundance of nicknames in no time.
My first little puppy. Stayed a puppy. So many people didn't believe his age. He got complimented so much in those waiting rooms, so many people told him how pretty he was. He was the softest dog you'd ever meet -his fur was so silky smooth, our friends called him a cloud.
He was smart and capable, even if his nerves failed him a lot of the time. He was such a little show-off in front of the camera sometimes, too. There's been a pit in my stomach and a hole in my heart since he left us. I hope he's chewing on Evie's ears again, and running amok through the stars. 10 years is not enough time with any of them, and it feels so unfair. I feel robbed. It's so cruel that he wasn't even on this earth long enough to get gray. I'm going to miss him so much. The silence will be deafening to me now, because it's not an absence of sound, but an absence of him.
Rest in peace and run free, soft boy. My awful waffle. My Astawaff. My Asterpuff. Our anxiety son. Our sweet, gooey eyed boy who had the best puppy eyes and would unapologetically steal peoples' seats on the couch. You are so loved and will be so, so dearly missed.
