01/09/2026
As someone with autism, delayed processing and alexithymia I have two types of sadness. Functional sadness and sit-and-stare sadness.
In functional sadness I just work like normal, live like normal and you can’t see it on me that I have any emotions and I can barely feel it myself. In the second one I actually can cry, something I don’t do a lot, but it’s just tears randomly falling while my face is blank.
Alexithymia means the inability to understand and process emotions like “normal” people and it’s a very common overlap within autism and in some with ADHD or trauma. It does not mean no feelings - it means misplaced, delayed or feelings you don’t understand unless they are screaming you in the face.
Delayed processing is another common overlap with autism and in some with ADHD, where you can feel perfectly fine and neutral, even in sad or traumatic or happy situations - just to break down days, weeks or even months later when the system has caught up.
This confusion can even lead to misplaced feelings such as arguing with your partner cause you don’t understand you’re having separation anxiety so your brain tells you “I don’t know what this is, maybe you’re angry? I understand angry”. This is just one of many examples that can be seen in not just neurodivergent kids, but full on neurodivergent adults as well.
