11/10/2017
“How can you do it?”, “I couldn’t keep my kids away from family like that”, or the best one yet “Your so lucky to be married to someone in the military.” These are just a few of the many questions/statements I hear quite often.
“How can you do it?”
To this my answer is love him. I love him with all of my heart and soul. He gives us security and safety with what he does in his every day life. No I did not marry him for the “health care” or “benefits”. I’m not sure how so many people assume that’s why people marry into the military. Those things just came with the package. Do you think I enjoy having my husband leave for years of our marriage to places he can’t even tell me about? No way! It’s takes a lot of love to accept your spouse coming and going out of your life and being accepting of it every time. The military men and women risk their lives for everyone, so that we go to sleep at night knowing we are safe from the people who want to destroy us. We should do more than love them, we should stand by them for doing such great things for this world!
“I couldn’t keep my kids away from family like that.”
Really?
Do you think I enjoy having Christmas over FaceTime every year, or explaining to my kids who family is because they haven’t met them? Not at all. Those are the seasons where emotions/loneliness can start to set in.
This is one of the many tough things we have to encounter when it comes to the military life. We might not be with our families from where we grew up, or get to celebrate all the events that happen back home, but we definitely have family here. The Military family is your home away from home. We will gather for holiday meals and enjoy each other’s company to keep the holidays alive. Though it might be tough, it is only temporary, remember we move more than we have time to settle! So we will eventually be close to family and can make up for all of the time missed!
“Your so lucky to be married to someone in the military.”
Ladies(or gentleman) listen up, it’s not what you think it is AT ALL. When I was a little girl I envisioned marrying someone from my hometown, then growing old in our little house where everyone knew everyone! But God had other plans for me, and it was so hard to accept in the beginning. Saying goodbye to everything I knew as safe or home to me was scary. Honestly, I sat many days thinking “this is definitely not what I thought military life was.” I had no friends, and all the acronyms people were using made me feel so out of place. Truth be honest, Just like you, I thought being a military was “a fairytale” that anyone would be lucky to live!
You never really have a place to call your forever home, because your moving every 3-4 years. Home is wherever you are at that moment, and we make the best of it and love all the ups and down of each. You have to say goodbye to close friends, ones that you can consider family! This is especially hard when your kids have to go through this with the friends they’ve made also. Yes there might be healthcare, and we never have to worry about not having a place to live. There are more pros than cons when it comes to this lifestyle, but the cons can be very significant. It’s not “cute homecoming videos” or “pictures of them in uniform”, this is OUR life. We have went months without our significant other, and it just so happened to be filmed/photographed. That is our other half back in our lives, and we honestly are just happy to know they are back in this country safe and sound, to catch up on our lives from where we left off. I promise from the outside it might look like “a fairytale” or “perfect life”, but from the inside we’re all just taking it day by day. We choose to make this life perfect to us, because everyone’s story is different! This involves spending every second that we can with our other half before it’s time to say goodbye again.
If there is anything I’ve learned so far in this journey it’s how to be patient, flexible, and always have a sense of humor! It really does take a special person to live this lifestyle, and I’m blessed every day that God chose me for it!
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9