10/18/2026
I use to say I wasn’t creative.
I would see artists and they were so talented, they painted, and drew, wrote songs and just created cool s**t…I just couldn’t do those things.
I tried!! Haha but I just couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t “interested” why couldn’t I just frickin be good at some art!!
I use to hang magazine pages on my walls, I loved the fashion ones, the elaborate clothes and kick as women I would see on the cover! Anything alternative or badass would catch my eye, but I didn’t want to be her…
It was art i just wanted to look at it, to feel it, to rub the perfume pages on my wrist and dance around while listening to the cocktail record on loop 😂
It was an escapee a fantasy and I didn’t know it at the time but all of this was helping me create a safe space for myself, where I could just be myself. I needed calm, to be in fantasy, to talk as much as I wanted, to hear and feel music, to visual see what made me feel normal and delighted…
I am very much a get s**t done kind of person, but when I would get low or experiences deep raw emotions i had a hard time functioning. I would work two-three jobs and spend my time off in bed, I would just crash and hide away…I struggled for a long time.
This isn’t my life story, it’s just a piece that I have been reflecting on. I was diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year and it has made me reflect on life and see how heavy things were, and that we truly don’t know what we don’t know.
It has changed my life in so many ways, and also really makes me question how I want my next 40 years to go.
There are what ten weeks left in 2026?! So why not get super dam intentional? I have said so many times “this is my year”!! 😂 well, this is my day! And so is tomorrow, and the next, and the next….
Any way, I should probably go to bed! Gnight! And go do some cool s**t tomorrow ❤️
