15/05/2026
I turned 41 on Wednesday. Which feels slightly absurd because internally I still fluctuate between “capable adult woman” and “someone who has lost her phone while actively holding it.”
But if I’m honest, I think I’m more excited about this decade than any other so far.
There’s something unexpectedly freeing about getting older. Not because everything magically becomes easier (absolutely not), but because the constant need to prove yourself starts loosening its grip a little. You care less about performing your life correctly and more about actually living it.
Hubbs and I spent the day at the Hot Springs this week, completely kid free, which honestly felt medically needed after the last few years, haha. We sat around in fluffy robes pretending we were serene wellness people instead of two exhausted parents discussing school lunches, whether we should divide and conquer Saturday sport or go together, and what snacks to pack for the two year old so he’s not running onto the court mid-game like an unhinged streaker.
Somewhere between the sauna and the cold plunge, I discovered I apparently love sauna culture with the intensity of someone about to become deeply annoying about it.
I’m now trying to convince Nath we need a barrel sauna at home immediately.
(If you own a sauna business and need photos, hit me up. I work for heat therapy.)
Then the other night, I went to my first live choral performance.
And this part surprised me.
I didn’t just enjoy it. It moved me in a way I wasn’t expecting at all. The sound felt almost physical. Like standing inside a living instrument while waves of human voices wrapped around you like blankets. It felt ancient and human and strangely sacred all at once.
I drove home thinking about how wild it is that at this stage of life, after babies and burnout and identity shifts and all the millions of tiny ways motherhood reshapes you, you can still discover entirely new parts of yourself….
New things to love.
New things to long for.
New ways of being in the world.
CONTINUED IN POST 👆🏻