06/23/2026
I’m sick today and sitting here going through my phone looking at old photos I’ve taken over the years. I thought I’d share those and discuss a subject that I think about a lot when I’m scrolling through social media.
It feels to me that there are two kinds of folks in the Amish world. The kind that admires them to nearly an obsession and those who vehemently hate the Amish.
The former Amish folks so often spew their venomous hate and bitterness with no allowances for the Amish to make mistakes, to forgive them, to heal, or to move on. It’s like they are on a mission to shed as much ill light on the Amish as they possibly can.
I was there once. After we left the Amish, life became hard, it felt like we had lost everyone close to us. It was a raw period in our lives.
Not only did I have to deal with the affects of leaving the Amish, I was in the middle of weekly counseling, trying to figure out how to forgive the ones who abused me. I wanted a normal life, I deeply longed for it and at one point life was so heavy, I wanted to leave Ohio, take our children and leave forever.
A part of me was done with being shunned. A part of me longed for something normal, new family, new church, new friends. I thought moving away might gain all that for me. Just go and start over.
Those were the darkest times of my life and the next part I have to share is highly controversial among the former Amish. (not all, please hear me, I’m not criticizing every former Amish)
I found my way to Jesus. There was a moment in our living room when I was alone that he let me know he hears my cries. After that encounter my heart started to feel lighter. My soul felt like singing. Hard things became easy. I slowly started to heal and I learned what it meant to truly forgive.
This makes me emotional even today when I think about how awful it would be if I were still angry, bitter and unforgiving. The relief that forgiveness brought to my mind and my soul is immeasurable.
Being able to truly forgive set me on this path of healing and the things the Amish did no longer set me off. They eventually quit shunning us and we have a better relationship with our family than we had when we were Amish.
How much we would’ve missed out on if we had moved away and harbored an unforgiving spirit.
I’ve been ridiculed, shamed and blocked by the former Amish for talking about this. I remember one person called me a Mennonite B****.
I feel sad for those folks who keep speaking out about their own abuses done against them but they never find healing. Everyone should be able to share their voice, I’ve been accused of not wanting people to have a voice.
My opinion is how much freer it is to become quiet, let God heal the hurt, extend forgiveness and have a testimony of healing and hope to share when you use your voice.
Forgiveness is not a feeling, it’s a choice. Every time anger raged its ugly head, reminding me of the abuses I would quietly remind the thought that it needs to go away because this day, I, again, choose to forgive.
After hours, days and months of choosing forgiveness the feeling that I had forgiven, truly with all my heart, enveloped me. I was able to talk with folks and extend verbal forgiveness to them which was another layer of healing for me.
I see how the commenters are opinionated on the Amish lifestyle these days. I sense a deep seated hate for the Amish and afraid we will hear of road rage at some point.
The Amish are far, far from perfect and any Amish I know would tell you that immediately if you asked them. They are aware of the hypocrisy that some of their lifestyle looks like too.
Looking down the road I think the Amish will be deciding on some things. I even foresee a split coming. I know of young marrieds who are troubled with the direction the Amish are going. They wish the Amish held back more.
A lot of the changes the Amish have made aren’t Biblical in nature. I believe God cares about the motives and intent of our heart. I believe he cares about his will being done. So much of what is squabbled over absolutely means nothing in light of eternity.
I’d just like to see those who oppose the Amish find healing and forgiveness in their hearts. I’d like for them to share their voices with messages of healing and overcoming. Being a victim is tiring and no rest for that person.
This is my opinion and what I believe and I hope you hear my voice, and my testimony of healing without feeling like I’m passing judgement on to anyone.
All the best to you. 💞🦋💞
Lue Shetler
