04/28/2020
You know those Powerball machines where the lotto balls are blown around in a container, bouncing off the walls and each other, speeding around so fast you can hardly make out one from another? That’s how my thoughts are right now except there are no winning numbers. I’ve been really struggling with my anxiety during this time and my thoughts are out of control. It’s something I’ve always had trouble with but I feel like my ability to manage and cope has regressed. My thoughts are so many, so out of control and overwhelming that I’ll just shut down. Sleep for 14 hours, not wash my hair for a week, forget to feed myself. I’m trying to figure ways to calm my thoughts, accept the situation, manage my anxiety but it can be hard. I just think back to the day I took this photo (late April 2018) - everything was beautiful and still. I just need some calm right now. Everyone is dealing with this in their own way whether it’s starting a new workout routine, picking up a hobby or new skill or just managing to get out of bed, make breakfast, brush your teeth. All we can do is try our best and be kind to each other. Always and especially during these trying times. It’s one thing I’m striving towards. Anyways, that’s it for today’s expressions, me attempting to give voice to what I’m feeling and thinking right now.
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I hope everyone is hanging in there and you can always reach out to talk about everything or nothing or whatever you want. Take care and stay well ♥️
