10/20/2025
It’s been a very long time since I’ve been active on Facebook… and as I come back I want to be more honest about my mental health journey.
Truthfully things haven’t been good for a while. I’ve had some amazing days but very painful periods. 2022 was when I got Depersonalization Disorder and I feel like things have been hard since then. The black and white picture is from tonight and I couldn’t stop crying looking at my old photos from 10 years ago. My eyes are happier and I compare them to recent photos where a lot of the times they’re dimmer.
I’ve suffered with poor mental health since I was a child and around 10 years ago I might have been handling things better but it’s been very hard lately for me. But I’m staying strong. As a result I’m walking away from major filmmaking for a while just to really work on recovery and maintenance. I wouldn’t wish a lot of what I’ve gone through on many.. it’s been hell on and off.
I write this for anyone who has known me. I’m just tired of appearing like things look good all the time when they’re not.
But I’m hanging in there and if you’re struggling too, you’re not alone. I cry a lot actually behind closed doors and I’m not afraid to admit that. A lot of people have lost their lives as a result of not being transparent with what they struggle with. Being honest about my scars helps to keep going.
More to come. Thank you for following me despite myself being quiet. 🌹esp
